Sunday, 27 August 2017

Plan before or regret later

Care at Madhur Bhav
There are lots of calls and updates every day from Madhurbhav. But this one was a little disturbing. One morning, a (seemingly) regular call turned out to be more than just that. I was told that Kulkarni Ajji (Name Changed) was not keeping well for the last four days. Her daughter had strictly instructed us not to admit her to the hospital because their family would be busy for a few days to come and could not visit if needed. The daughter added, she should be brave and not complain about little things to the Madhurbhav staff and them.

She was admitted to Madhurbhav, for complete rest, as she wasn’t able to do anything on her own and was also not able to sleep on the bed. Having fractures in her hip bones, she was restricted to the wheel chair. Surgery was neither safe nor useful for her, because of her age limitations. Her damaged bone condition made it difficult to withstand any medical procedure. Rest was the only alternative. Imagine constantly being on a chair, not being able to lie down on the bed even for half an hour and having bandaged legs because of constant swelling.

Madhurbhav is assisted care facility. As far as possible we try to give all the required treatments (medical) and care like RT feed, bed sores management, catheter etc.

When I went to Madhurbhav, Ajji was palpating and gasping. Her family was insisting not to admit her to the hospital. They were concerned about soaring expenses if the hospital admitted her to the ICU. At times humans become so insensitive! At one point they said, ‘let us talk to the doctors treating her and then we shall take a decision.’ I went to ajji and told her, "we need to go to the hospital". She refused but then I promised her that the expenses will be taken care by me / Madhurbhav.
I had to tell her relatives that we can’t wait for their approval as she is in serious condition and that they might not even see her next. I suppose that is what made them decide to reach Pune ASAP.

I have been working with seniors for a decade, and when relatives provide a DNR (Do not resuscitate), it is very painful for me. What is more important to them, money or the health and well being of their family member? Providing DNR is like denying their right to live. For a terminal illness like cancer, we can understand the DNR. But for something like dehydration, weakness, etc when family members don’t allow us to take patients to the hospital, it’s surprising and heartbreaking!

I think as parents and responsible individuals, we should plan very well and secure ourselves financially for such later times, so that we do not have to be victims of these dark shades of humans, where and when they prioritize money over lives of their family members.


  1. Nice blog,this Madhur Bhav is good for Senior citizen for Assisted Living in Pune as they take care a lot and make people comfortable.
    Assisted living in Pune

  2. nice blog.each and every article was informative and heart touching.
    great work keep going

    best old age homes in hyderabad